8.12 Anal Sex?

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12. Anal Sex? –Update 26 Aug. 2021

Anal sex is problematic! The anal opening (Commonly "asshole") accepts erect penis with difficulty, and successful insertion requires good lubrication, knowledge of the anatomy, patience, tact, and gentility – Yes, gentility! By which I mean gentleness and tender loving sensitivity to the receptive partner’s gift of allowing an uncomfortable and un-thrilling penetration so that the active one can experience a unique pleasure.

   It can be a highly thrilling experience, for the first time in a relationship, to succeed at slipping one’s penis into a partner's rather tight anus and entering into a soft, furry-feeling, rectum (the several-cm long space just above the anal opening), knowing one’s partner has made the loving, unselfish gift in anal intercourse. I cannot speak for the receiver of rectal penetration but I guess, psychologically, receiving through anus allows a man to experience the female receptive role, and also has the same kind of mental pleasure as giving oral sex because you know you are pleasuring your partner without your own physical pleasure and even at the expense your own discomfort.

   Anal sex if practiced at all, should be a rare part of the sexual repertoire. It may be preceded by finger play by one who will insert penis. (Warning: Always immediately precede it with thorough antiseptic mouthwash and cleaning of anus and surrounding areas and follow it with cleaning mouth and fingers.)

It is the most health-problematic sexual act. Done ignorantly and forcibly it may be very painful and can lacerate anal muscles and perforate rectum. It can transmit all the sexual and fecal-oral diseases: from amebiasis to syphilis. And it has the highest risk for HIV transmission of all sexual acts.

Instructions and precautions for those who wish to try it safely: Although the one who seeks out anal sex can be its recipient, usually he is the one who penetrates so I will take his standpoint. One does not consider trying it with any partner. Only with a partner about whom one has detailed knowledge. Anyone who is many-partnered (by this I mean in the habit of carelessly doing sex with more than one person in the same period) ought to be out! So it should be someone you are sure is your Only. Outside of a certainly monogamous relationship it should be a partner with recent (w/in 1 month) HIV negative test.

   In starting anal sex, it will be part of the normal relationship so one approaches it in the usual pre-coital sex play instead of suddenly presenting its doing to a partner. It is considered a perversion by many so one wants to get a partner’s attitude.
   This brings us to knowledge of anatomy. Entering the anus-rectum tube describes something of an S-shape in the vertical of the mid line of body. Best way to appreciate these curvatures is for one to do digital examination of one’s own anus/rectum (Squatting in bath is best) and then one’s partner’s-rectal entrance canal using lubricated finger.

   An actual first attempt at anal sex, ought to be preceded by asking your partner and assuring the utmost gentleness.

   One does not want to do anal sex if rectum has feces. The rectum tends to fill immediately after eating and tends to be empty after an unhurried defecation not followed by eating or drinking. So plan a anal sex more than several hours at least after eating and also not long after the partner has emptied rectum, e.g., early A.M. within the few hours before leaving the bed for morning activity and after one’s mate goes to WC to check empty rectum and shower before returning to bed.

   Two positions are good for entrance. Missionary position (recipient on back, thighs flexed and wide apart and held high by recipient’s hands pulling back and apart thighs) is best for 1st try and also because the face to face allows for oral lip-tongue/verbal lovemaking as you proceed. In this position, the one who penetrates lowers himself between the open thighs for the approach. Another position for entry is the medical knee-chest: the recipient on knees with ass-buttocks held high and head & shoulders down on mat over folded hands. For comfort, several pillows are placed for support. This is for a couple experienced in anal sex.

Lubrication is important. Anal sex should never precede penis-vagina sex because of risk of transmitting infection. For good lubrication, antibiotic ointment without anesthetic applied to penis tip and smeared over anal opening is best.

   Penetrating the anus requires deliberate gentleness and control. He who does the penetration may get a hand hold of his erection in order to direct it. (With experienced couples, the recipient often prefers to direct the partner’s penis by her hand hold, which is easier face-to-face.) Slowly enter and while entering make tender gentle love to your partner. (It is truly a moment when the penetrent feels the greatest loving tenderness toward his partner’s gift.) As the erect penis slowly is worked into the anal opening, the one who penetrates will feel the give when it enters and then the shaft slides forward and penis follows path of least resistance. It is important on entering with penis not to lunge, or push hard. Just allow gentle entry and small movements while expressing love and hoping your partner is feeling no pain. Later, gentle movements will be OK, but they should never be lunges.

  

   When the above instructions are followed strictly, anal sex may be safe. As with oral sex, the biggest thrill is the first time and as it becomes habitual the thrill gets less. Most couples continue to prefer normal coitus and relegate anal sex for the occasional variety. It can be useful in satisfying a husband during pregnancy when vaginal sex becomes dangerous for the pregnancy. Also after operations on the vagina, it is a boon to a continuing sexual relationship. And in an older woman who starts a relationship with a younger man. One more place where anal sex is useful could be with a virginal girl who wants to keep her maidenhead intact yet is interested in giving her partner the equivalent of coitus.
   For scenes of rectal sex, which although fictional are based on real scenarios, click 2.64 After Coffee, Rectal Sex Delights, 5.(12-13) Ne Plus Ultra - Sex! Sex! Sex!, 12.9 Sex! Sex! Sex! Old Man in Young Rectum with ..., and 12.17 Lovemaking Surpassing All - Ecstasy Hedy Ne... .

END OF CHAPTER. To read on next now, click 8.13 Sex and An Aging Male - This 80 y/o Doc